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visiblepattern) wrote2022-06-21 12:37 pm
visiblepattern) wrote2022-06-21 12:37 pm
Unknown Seas Inventory
STUFF HE WILL SHAMELESSLY YARD SALE TO ANYONE WHO WANTS IT
09. Marionette (x2) - An intricate and complex puppet that either looks creepy or cool, depending on your point of view. Surprisingly fun to mix and match with each other!
11. Non-Descript Golden Man Award (x2) - A gold statue of a blank man, sized to be held in one hand! A sign on the bottom says it’s for… Best Grandma? Unfortunately it’s not even made out of gold, it’s just gold-painted bronze.
14. Coconut - It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you, but it refuses to complain…
20. Blobfish Kigurumi - No one asked for this. No one needed to bring this into the world.
21. Labcoat - A standard white labcoat, perfect for pretending you’re a lab assistant to some kind of professor!
22. Weirdly Specific T-Shirt - Hang on, how many people does this actually apply to? Also it’s like size XXXL.
25. Bathrobe - A cheap deep red bathrobe, for when you want to look classy in your study but you just aren’t the kind of person with money for things like “a study” or “books” or “quality fabric.”
26. Distinguished Dress - A beautiful, beautiful… article of clothing. (x2)
28. Freeze-Dried Ice Cream - Pretend you’re an astronaut! Only available in vanilla, but there's an ad on the back for other flavors.
31. Hand Bra - Who the heck left this in here? It almost seems like it belongs in a whole other world.
35. Plastic Mask - For when you want to look… Handsome.
39. The Dreaded Knarrevik - An IKEA-branded nightstand! Comes unassembled in-box with the instructions missing. Good luck!
40. Pin-Up Calendar? - A calendar for the year 1965, featuring lurid pictures of… large men in full diving suits?
48. Incredible Soaking Device - A water gun! Surely you will all be very responsible with this.
49. At-Home Planetarium - A glass ball that lights up and projects stars! Doesn’t work if the room is too big or if the lights are on, though.
51. Foam Dart Pistol - A small pistol that uses pressurized air to shoot foam darts! No notable brand, but it works well enough.
54. _____ in Wonderland - A copy of Alice in Wonderland, except Alice’s name has been replaced with yours. That’s the power of public domain, baby.
58. Hawaiian Shirt (x2) - Dealer’s choice of any of these button-ups! Pretend like you’re on a cruise-themed murdergame instead of this one.
60. Toy Car (x2) - A small, RC car! Race them around!
61. Radio Play - A Fontaine Futuristics Accu-Vox recording featuring part of a serialized adventure.
OTHER PEOPLE'S STUFF
Crystal Ball: A broken crystal ball held together with adhesive tape. The previous owner used this item to predict the future. 30 percent of the time, he was accurate 100 percent of the time. (Returned to Hagakure.)
Mirror: A small shaving mirror that has been shattered beyond repair, like if someone threw it from a high place.
Vengeful Essence: A purple crystal that hums with a malevolent energy. The ends are needlessly pointy... (Returned to Seo Dawon)
Crankcase action figure: A piece of plastic can be something that’s so miserable.
STUFF HE IS KEEPING
03. Tea Variety Pack (x2) - An assortment of different teas, mostly green tea blends. If you find one you like, better hope another one of these drops, because there’s only one of each in here!
07. Nisse - A stuffed friend for the holidays, or really any other time of the year - Gaze upon it, love it, take it home.
17. Rations - A set of military rations. At least they’ll never go bad?
23. Wetsuit - A full skintight wetsuit! Somehow, despite the random nature of the vending machine, it fits you perfectly.
24. Punk Jeans - A pair of black skinny jeans torn and safety pinned back together so thoroughly, you’re not sure how much of the fabric is left. But hey, they fit!
29. Bible+ - A copy of the Bible! Hang on, there’s an extra section at the back… why is there a bunch of cool drawings of dragons in here?
36. Shovel (x2) - A normal shovel. For digging. You know, with all the dirt you have access to.
43. “Extra-Large Spice Grinder” - It’s. It’s just a full-on Medieval-style mace.
44. “Personal Space Reminder” - A small handheld device that, when you press a button, generates an external current of electricity. Could be dangerous if you touched someone with the electric parts!
47. Snow Globe - A souvenir from… it looks like your deeprealm? Perfect to put on a shelf and look at once in a while.
49. At-Home Planetarium - A glass ball that lights up and projects stars! Doesn’t work if the room is too big or if the lights are on, though.
50. Corkboard - A small bulletin board with some pins stuck into it! Perfect for making intricate displays about how everything’s connected, or about non-existent workers in the building you work at.
54. _____ in Wonderland - A copy of Alice in Wonderland, except Alice’s name has been replaced with yours. That’s the power of public domain, baby.
56. Stuffed Big Daddy - A stuffed toy shaped like… a huge man with a drill for a hand? Don’t worry, he’s soft!
62. Inflatable Crocodile - An inflatable crocodile that one can lounge on! Love the crocodile. Be the crocodile.
63. First Aid Spray - A can of medicinal spray, courtesy of the Umbrella Corporation. Its instant-healing effects don't work here, unfortunately, but it'll at least clean wounds out to keep them from getting infected. Ironically.
64. Orbs - Some simple, rainbow colored orbs. Something good might happen if you save them up.
70. “Deluxe Letter Opener” - A one-and-a-half handed sword of decent make! For when you want to go Medieval on someone.
74. Those Who Sunbathe In The Dark - A beach towel with an interesting design.
Celestica Flute: A strange flute that one can use to summon a companion to ride into the world with! Unfortunately, much like a normal flute, it doesn't work if you have no talent for it. (Courtesy of Adaman.)
Core Drill - A strange small drill that seems to hold some sort of mysterious power... but sadly you cannot pierce the heavens here without causing a flood.
Hootle plush - It's a plush of a rather cute Dahan owl! (Courtesy of Vholran)
’Invincible Rainbow Arrow’: a disc that contains a recording of A-Set’s song ‘Invincible Rainbow Arrow’. Choreography not included. (Courtesy of Aiba)
Pink Dino Charge Morpher - Is this some sort of gun? It can shoot nerf darts, but you get the sense that it’s supposed to do something very different.
Translator Bracelet - Looking to figure out what your girlfriend really means when she says she's "Fine?!" Too bad! This shit's broken as hell. (Courtesy of Dandy)
STUFF HE NO LONGER HAS FOR WHATEVER REASON
01. Donut - These donuts are great! Jelly-filled are my favorite! Which is to say yes, this is a single jelly-filled donut. It doesn’t even look suspiciously like any other kind of food. (Consumed.)
10. Mango (x2) - A relatively high-quality mango, which might be surprising the longer into this whole thing you get one out of the machine. You could make a religion out of this. (Consumed.)
12. Live Bait - A styrofoam cup just… full of worms. In case you want to go fishing, or pull a really mean prank! (Worms brought to the garden, where they are doing their worm thing.)
13. A Gallon of Seawater - Literally just some seawater spills out onto the floor from the mouth of the vending machine. Why this? (i mean.....)
14. Coconut - It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you, but it refuses to complain…
27. Gingerbread House (x3) - A whole elegantly designed gingerbread house with all kinds of candy accents. (Partially consumed, then thrown out.)
30. I Can’t Believe it’s Not Margarine! - A single stick of unsalted butter. Better refrigerate it. (Discarded.)
46. An Egg (x2) - Can the vending machine offer you one of these in this trying time? Hard-boiled, at least. (Thrown out; it was in the machine, it's probably gross.)
55. Pep Bar (x3) - Sort of a combination energy and candy bar? Guaranteed to put a pep in your step! (Consumed.)
67. Lemon - This is a lemon. (...Okay...)
69. A Cool Refreshing Beverage - Nice! (Consumed. Hated, but consumed.)
Big Mac - The McDonald's standard! This could be one of the most delicious things you ever taste. (Courtesy of Hodaka) (Con...sumed???)
09. Marionette (x2) - An intricate and complex puppet that either looks creepy or cool, depending on your point of view. Surprisingly fun to mix and match with each other!
11. Non-Descript Golden Man Award (x2) - A gold statue of a blank man, sized to be held in one hand! A sign on the bottom says it’s for… Best Grandma? Unfortunately it’s not even made out of gold, it’s just gold-painted bronze.
14. Coconut - It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you, but it refuses to complain…
20. Blobfish Kigurumi - No one asked for this. No one needed to bring this into the world.
21. Labcoat - A standard white labcoat, perfect for pretending you’re a lab assistant to some kind of professor!
22. Weirdly Specific T-Shirt - Hang on, how many people does this actually apply to? Also it’s like size XXXL.
25. Bathrobe - A cheap deep red bathrobe, for when you want to look classy in your study but you just aren’t the kind of person with money for things like “a study” or “books” or “quality fabric.”
26. Distinguished Dress - A beautiful, beautiful… article of clothing. (x2)
28. Freeze-Dried Ice Cream - Pretend you’re an astronaut! Only available in vanilla, but there's an ad on the back for other flavors.
31. Hand Bra - Who the heck left this in here? It almost seems like it belongs in a whole other world.
35. Plastic Mask - For when you want to look… Handsome.
39. The Dreaded Knarrevik - An IKEA-branded nightstand! Comes unassembled in-box with the instructions missing. Good luck!
40. Pin-Up Calendar? - A calendar for the year 1965, featuring lurid pictures of… large men in full diving suits?
48. Incredible Soaking Device - A water gun! Surely you will all be very responsible with this.
49. At-Home Planetarium - A glass ball that lights up and projects stars! Doesn’t work if the room is too big or if the lights are on, though.
51. Foam Dart Pistol - A small pistol that uses pressurized air to shoot foam darts! No notable brand, but it works well enough.
54. _____ in Wonderland - A copy of Alice in Wonderland, except Alice’s name has been replaced with yours. That’s the power of public domain, baby.
58. Hawaiian Shirt (x2) - Dealer’s choice of any of these button-ups! Pretend like you’re on a cruise-themed murdergame instead of this one.
60. Toy Car (x2) - A small, RC car! Race them around!
61. Radio Play - A Fontaine Futuristics Accu-Vox recording featuring part of a serialized adventure.
OTHER PEOPLE'S STUFF
Crystal Ball: A broken crystal ball held together with adhesive tape. The previous owner used this item to predict the future. 30 percent of the time, he was accurate 100 percent of the time. (Returned to Hagakure.)
Mirror: A small shaving mirror that has been shattered beyond repair, like if someone threw it from a high place.
Vengeful Essence: A purple crystal that hums with a malevolent energy. The ends are needlessly pointy... (Returned to Seo Dawon)
Crankcase action figure: A piece of plastic can be something that’s so miserable.
STUFF HE IS KEEPING
03. Tea Variety Pack (x2) - An assortment of different teas, mostly green tea blends. If you find one you like, better hope another one of these drops, because there’s only one of each in here!
07. Nisse - A stuffed friend for the holidays, or really any other time of the year - Gaze upon it, love it, take it home.
17. Rations - A set of military rations. At least they’ll never go bad?
23. Wetsuit - A full skintight wetsuit! Somehow, despite the random nature of the vending machine, it fits you perfectly.
24. Punk Jeans - A pair of black skinny jeans torn and safety pinned back together so thoroughly, you’re not sure how much of the fabric is left. But hey, they fit!
29. Bible+ - A copy of the Bible! Hang on, there’s an extra section at the back… why is there a bunch of cool drawings of dragons in here?
36. Shovel (x2) - A normal shovel. For digging. You know, with all the dirt you have access to.
43. “Extra-Large Spice Grinder” - It’s. It’s just a full-on Medieval-style mace.
44. “Personal Space Reminder” - A small handheld device that, when you press a button, generates an external current of electricity. Could be dangerous if you touched someone with the electric parts!
47. Snow Globe - A souvenir from… it looks like your deeprealm? Perfect to put on a shelf and look at once in a while.
49. At-Home Planetarium - A glass ball that lights up and projects stars! Doesn’t work if the room is too big or if the lights are on, though.
50. Corkboard - A small bulletin board with some pins stuck into it! Perfect for making intricate displays about how everything’s connected, or about non-existent workers in the building you work at.
54. _____ in Wonderland - A copy of Alice in Wonderland, except Alice’s name has been replaced with yours. That’s the power of public domain, baby.
56. Stuffed Big Daddy - A stuffed toy shaped like… a huge man with a drill for a hand? Don’t worry, he’s soft!
62. Inflatable Crocodile - An inflatable crocodile that one can lounge on! Love the crocodile. Be the crocodile.
63. First Aid Spray - A can of medicinal spray, courtesy of the Umbrella Corporation. Its instant-healing effects don't work here, unfortunately, but it'll at least clean wounds out to keep them from getting infected. Ironically.
64. Orbs - Some simple, rainbow colored orbs. Something good might happen if you save them up.
70. “Deluxe Letter Opener” - A one-and-a-half handed sword of decent make! For when you want to go Medieval on someone.
74. Those Who Sunbathe In The Dark - A beach towel with an interesting design.
Celestica Flute: A strange flute that one can use to summon a companion to ride into the world with! Unfortunately, much like a normal flute, it doesn't work if you have no talent for it. (Courtesy of Adaman.)
Core Drill - A strange small drill that seems to hold some sort of mysterious power... but sadly you cannot pierce the heavens here without causing a flood.
Hootle plush - It's a plush of a rather cute Dahan owl! (Courtesy of Vholran)
’Invincible Rainbow Arrow’: a disc that contains a recording of A-Set’s song ‘Invincible Rainbow Arrow’. Choreography not included. (Courtesy of Aiba)
Pink Dino Charge Morpher - Is this some sort of gun? It can shoot nerf darts, but you get the sense that it’s supposed to do something very different.
Translator Bracelet - Looking to figure out what your girlfriend really means when she says she's "Fine?!" Too bad! This shit's broken as hell. (Courtesy of Dandy)
STUFF HE NO LONGER HAS FOR WHATEVER REASON
01. Donut - These donuts are great! Jelly-filled are my favorite! Which is to say yes, this is a single jelly-filled donut. It doesn’t even look suspiciously like any other kind of food. (Consumed.)
10. Mango (x2) - A relatively high-quality mango, which might be surprising the longer into this whole thing you get one out of the machine. You could make a religion out of this. (Consumed.)
12. Live Bait - A styrofoam cup just… full of worms. In case you want to go fishing, or pull a really mean prank! (Worms brought to the garden, where they are doing their worm thing.)
13. A Gallon of Seawater - Literally just some seawater spills out onto the floor from the mouth of the vending machine. Why this? (i mean.....)
14. Coconut - It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you, but it refuses to complain…
27. Gingerbread House (x3) - A whole elegantly designed gingerbread house with all kinds of candy accents. (Partially consumed, then thrown out.)
30. I Can’t Believe it’s Not Margarine! - A single stick of unsalted butter. Better refrigerate it. (Discarded.)
46. An Egg (x2) - Can the vending machine offer you one of these in this trying time? Hard-boiled, at least. (Thrown out; it was in the machine, it's probably gross.)
55. Pep Bar (x3) - Sort of a combination energy and candy bar? Guaranteed to put a pep in your step! (Consumed.)
67. Lemon - This is a lemon. (...Okay...)
69. A Cool Refreshing Beverage - Nice! (Consumed. Hated, but consumed.)
Big Mac - The McDonald's standard! This could be one of the most delicious things you ever taste. (Courtesy of Hodaka) (Con...sumed???)